weeknotes 10

I had a second (and final) interview for a new job. It's in a different city, a small city I grew up near and went to college (the first time!) in, so it's a weird opportunity that I have. I am trepidatious, frustrated, and anxious. It took me so long to get to Chicago and leaving now feels like...it was just a waste of time to be here. Salaries are low, rents are high, jobs are competitive; what am I doing here? I feel like I've had a months long mourning period (that's a bit dramatic!) for my friendships, because what am I doing here? But to go back, like really, really go back...it's strange.

Through all of this, though, actually I am cautiously excited. I am very tired of much of the city, especially apartment living. I will miss the access to culture and events, but those won't be gone, not really, and I can travel very easily to the nearest large city. The cost of living would be so much less. I'll have the opportunity to earn, briefly, double salaries. But I am also trying not to be excited or hopeful because I do need to be offered the position over the other applicants.

Anyway, I've been at my own, self-imposed detente with my group chats. I just don't text in them, though I do respond to plan-making (at my leisure). This has been one of those things that I just did 180 on and it has been a little bit refreshing, but mostly...normal feeling. That's just how it is. A friend reached out to ask if I wanted to hang out Saturday evening, which was really nice. I'm going to host them for dinner and then we'll get a cocktail and see some kind of little performance at a local bar. I don't want to complain, so I'll leave it there. I'm going to make cold sear filet mignon with a red wine reduction, smashed potatoes, and roasted brussel sprouts with a balsamic glaze. Very much looking forward to it, but I can't decide if I want to serve a salad, too!

I'm lowkey obsessed with Marathon right now. Which is juuuuuuuuuuuuust...I played a truly ridiculous amount of Destiny and I know I'm obsessing over Marathon because I recognize every single design decision from something Bungie iterated over and over in Destiny! The aesthetic is also just pitch perfect. Already trying to justify building a PC...also, the soundtrack was composed by Son Lux and it absolutely rips!